I lay in the silence, fireworks in the distance I can hear, must be celebrating the holidays. How do I feel? A little low, not sure why. I think I'm missing out on life being hear in the monastery. Fear of the unknown I suppose. Breakfast tomorrow at 7:30, no talking, what should I do, where should I go. I really don't know what to say. Got room yuk, that's that feeling that once you're in bed you don't wanna move. It smells slightly of hair grease and sweat. The sheets are clean though. The room is clean and quite big with it. Very basic, no internet! Grr. Don't know about this retreat thing, just wanna go out or go home. Not feeling it, been asked to wear trousers at the next service. Don't know why these dress codes still exist. The service was sung in Latin, I could follow using the book in English. There was all sorts of bowing, sitting, standing and all that. I know when the Gospel is proclaimed we stand, that's before Jesus' words. We stand be...
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